There are many social traditions around loss that have been passed down for centuries. The funny thing is that not many of us have taken the time to question, why this is so?

Many of us follow them blindly and continue to say the things that others have said all because we are uncomfortable around loss and have no idea what the most ideal thing is to say.

A couple of years ago, Jenny, a friend, was almost ostracised because she started dating three months after Fred, her husband of 25 years had passed away. Many had bought into the belief that there was a certain amount of time that should pass before one should move on. Though little did they know that three months had been the exact time that Jenny and Fred had agreed upon before he had passed.

Fred knew that Jenny had deeply loved him. As he did her. Though he also knew that he did not want Jenny at home alone. Lonely. Watching the time pass. He knew that she was a people person and he wanted her out, living and loving life. He believed that he would be onto his next adventure in another realm, so what would be the point of Jenny not starting her next life’s adventure, in this realm.

Every time we think about Jenny and Fred, we always feel that they got it right.

• What do you think?
• Do you believe that there should be a certain amount of time, before moving on?
• Why are we all so bound by these traditions that do not serve us, now and probably not when they were even created?

It’s time for us to look at everything we do, say and believe about Grief and Loss and ask the question,

• How does this assist me to honour the person, place or thing, that I have just lost, whilst still honouring and respecting me in the process?

The last part of the question is something most of us forget in the process.

• How can I Honour and Respect me?

When this is placed into the equation you begin to see things differently and ask yourself more meaningful questions,

• What does this mean for me now and moving forward?

This is not a selfish question. It is something we need to consider and deep dive into. We are, after all, the only person we will be spending our entire life with, so our ‘wants and needs’ matter.

We are hopeful that when more of us have an in-depth understanding regarding the next few topics we will share, that the way people move on after any kind of loss is their choice.  An intellectual and informed choice, not one that has been forced upon us by ignorant traditions.

Reach out anytime.

Until we meet again, please remember that You Are Simply the BEST!!

Karen and Lesley

#BreakingGriefTraditions #IndividualHealingJourney #SelfRespectInGrief #QuestioningGriefNorms #BeyondLimitations

Self-reflection can be challenging due to the emotional discomfort it often entails when confronting past experiences and personal emotions. It requires a significant investment of time and effort, which can be difficult for those with busy lives. Additionally, the fear of discovering unpleasant truths about oneself and the lack of proper guidance can deter individuals from engaging in self-reflection.

Despite these challenges, self-reflection is a valuable tool for personal growth, emotional intelligence, and improved decision-making.

Sometimes all you require is a Mentor to assist you to overcome these obstacles.

Meet Laura. Laura is a major reason that I decided to put pen to paper and write my Demystifying Loss book….. which has become an international bestseller.

This is what she shared with me:

“Karen, I had my monthly check-up with my doctor the other day and she was surprised when she saw me. As I walked into her office she said “What have you been doing? Your whole persona is different, you are standing taller, you look amazing and somehow more confident?” “I mentioned that I had invested in your “Gift of Loss” five-session 1-2-1 program and that we had completed three sessions.” She told me to keep her updated as she had never seen such a dramatic change in someone in such a short amount of time. She then lowered my anti-depressant prescription to a quarter of what it had been and said to only take it when I needed it. I have not taken any, as thanks to you, I have the tools to see things from a new perspective, so nothing is worrying me as it did before.”

I thanked Laura for sharing this with me, stating that I was her guide, she was the one who had followed each step as advised. That she had done the work. She’d done the not so easy deep dive / reflection into herself so that she could find the gifts from the many tragic things that had happened in her life. The events that led her initially to the doctor who had prescribed the anti-depressants.

The fact that Laura’s doctor noticed such a significant change in her demeanour and was able to lower her anti-depressant prescription is a clear indicator of the positive changes she’s undergone. It’s not just about reducing medication; it’s about finding a renewed sense of purpose and happiness in life.

Laura was proof that there are always multiple ways to do life. That when you are open to looking for a different way, you begin to see things from a different perspective. Laura’s doctor’s comments assisted Laura to came to the most beautiful realisation: that she was receiving the benefits right from the start of our time together, as we had only completed three of our five sessions together.

Since then, I have received many similar comments like Laura’s from other clients. That they’re viewing life differently, that they have cut down on their medication and most importantly that they are beginning to love their life. That they have a reason to enthusiastically jump out of bed each morning.

So if you’ve been avoiding self-reflection maybe take the fact that you’re reading this post as a sign that now is the time for you to get out the mirror and your pen and paper!

You’ll be eternally grateful that you did, as self-reflection offers a myriad of benefits for personal development and well-being. It enables individuals to gain a deeper understanding of themselves, their values, and their motivations, fostering increased self-awareness and emotional intelligence….. ultimately guiding you to break through your barriers and move beyond limitations.

Reach out if you’d like to know the learn more.

Until we meet again, please remember that you are Simply the BEST!

Karen and Lesley

#SelfReflection #PersonalGrowth #EmbraceChange #MentorshipMatters #DemystifyingLoss #BeyondLimitations

I wish that I had been aware of everything that we share with you when I was going through all of my life’s tragic loss events

I did it the hard way. The same way that my grandparents and parents did it. They all had many major loss events. They all lost a child and many loved ones. Experienced breakdown of marriages, job losses, business losses, home foreclosures, financial losses, major health scares and many more loss events. I saw how they grieved and suffered. Mostly in silence.  And I was following the same pattern. Until I stopped and started looking for answers to some deep and meaningful questions.

The answers to those questions will be revealed in throughout our various posts. As you read, watch and listen you will learn how you can easily move beyond any kind of loss and create your better everyday life.

Love and loss are everyday occurrences.

The overwhelming emphasis is placed on learning how to acquire things to make life successful and happy. We have learned much about acquiring things, we have precious little accurate information on what to do when we lose people and things. This is quite ridiculous when you consider that we are all liable to face several major losses throughout our lives.

Sometimes loss is even predictable. Sometimes, like me, you will wake thinking you are going to have a lazy day at home, though within minutes you realise you have woken to learn how to move beyond a Mother’s Worst Nightmare!

Very few of us want to talk about loss, think about it and even less of us even know what to say when loss occurs (any kind of loss). Our universal lack of ‘loss intelligence’ can cause us to go into avoidance and suffer in silence. Creating a massive impact on our health, quality of life, our relationships and all other areas of our life.

It’s time to acknowledge that the way the majority of us, currently process the feelings caused by loss is not working for us; individually, as a community or for the western world.

That is why our posts are different.

We assist you to realise that just like a hangover, neither triumphs nor disasters, last forever. They will pass and the sooner you can bring Love back into the equation, the better your life will be. Though the most ideal way for you to know how to do this, is for us to first, delve into how we currently do loss. Then, how we can break that cycle and develop some helpful habits and steps for healthily coping with grief and suffering.

It does not matter which type of loss event brought you here, know that as you continue interacting with our posts, you will find the answers as to how you can easily move beyond any kind of loss and create your better everyday life.

We share learnings from a different perspective. Sharing how you can stop the suffering and grieving and start more consciously living and loving.

It’s about you gaining a loss intelligence, that will ensure that next time loss comes to visit, you will not suffer and grieve for as long. There will no longer be the need to go into avoidance. Or to suffer in silence. Nor have your health, quality of life, relationships, professional, financial and other areas of your life affected by what has happened.

As you will be able to easily apply the skills and understandings from embracing the Intelligence you have gained regarding Loss.

We will take you through the “Gift of Loss” intelligence that will provide you with a five-step process, that you will be able to utilise for the rest of your life.

We still can’t figure out why this is not a high school subject.

All our lives would have been so much easier if it had been.

So, connect and follow up. That way you be alerted the next time we post and share our Beyond Loss intelligence that enables you to design a life that you will live and love, every day.

The life that you were born to live!

Reach out any time.

Until we meet again, remember that you are simply the best!

Karen and Lesley

#RedefiningLoss #BeyondGrief  #HealingJourney #TransformingSuffering #BeyondLimitations

Have you ever thought someone not fighting for you, was the best thing that ever happened?

In my case, I have gratitude to Daniel, my former CEO.

In late 2012, when our company was merging with another, the new directors decided that I would not be the CFO though they wanted me for a lesser role, “doing all that you do now plus more.” Of course, for less money – actually two-thirds of my current salary.

Daniel gave me the greatest gift anyone can give another.

He gave me a reason to say NO and then to STOP.

The stopping allowed me to deep dive into the way that I was living. This gift allowed me to know that we are all here in this realm to learn and grow.

To learn many lessons along the way. It is through our many losses, that we grow the most. And sometimes we require Mentors in our life to assist us to gain a new perspective on how to easily navigate what we are going through and have been through.

I love who I have become and what I do.

How could I not?……………………. I assist people to move beyond any kind of loss and create their better everyday life!

My son, Dan who passed away in 2011 truly saved my life. As now through healthier food choices, I have reversed any major illness, I was rapidly heading towards.

A few years ago, I resonated with a post that stated, “if you are always angry you probably require more green in your life.”

I thought, OMG, that was me.

I was always angry when I was living my CFO life. Always trying to prove something, always needing to be right. So ridiculous. And yes, I rarely ate green vegetables, then.

Now I have green juice several times a day, as well as many salads.

Though as I delved deeper into the comment, I realised that green is also the colour of the heart chakra.

Recognising that during my CFO days, I required more love in my life, especially for myself. It’s also the colour of nature. I did not spend much time in nature or grounding myself either, then.

• How about you, are you always angry?
• Do you require more green in your life?
• More vibrant energy-giving plant-based food?
• And more importantly, more Love, for yourself and others?

I was too busy making a living instead of living as though I loved myself. And if I’m honest I was not truly loving others around me, either.

How can you love others when you don’t love yourself?

Over the past 12 years, since Dan’s passing, I discovered that:

• “if you are the only person, you will spend your entire life with, why do you put yourself last and give up on your dreams?
• when you drift apart from the real you, life does not work. It may for a little while, though it will not long term.

And most importantly, I discovered that you don’t have to spend your health to get your wealth.

• How often do you ignore your body?
• How often do you ignore your mind?
• How often do you ignore your inner voice?
• How often do you ignore your friends and family?
• How often do you keep yourself busy, with just being busy?
• How often do you waste your hard-earned money?
• How often do you tap dance to work and tap dance home?

What have you discovered from answering these questions?

Until we meet again, please remember that You Are Simply the BEST!

Karen & Lesley

#SelfDiscovery #FulfillmentJourney #GreenTransformation #SelfLoveMatters #LifeLessons #BeyondLimitations